I'm adding grapefruit to the list of foods I refuse to eat ever again! We have broken up, Grapefruit, and I'm not planning on crawling back to you. Ever.
I gave it two tries. Yesterday I brought half of a grapefruit, and tried to eat it with a fork. If you ever want to feel inferior to any fruit, try to successfully eat a grapefruit with a fork. Not only is it fucking impossible, but you basically get your very own hand crafted, money-shot every time you stab it. In the end, there's grapefruit all of your face and hands and you've barely caught the slightest taste of it. Grapefruit: 1 Joey: 0.
In fact if my description wasn't good enough for those who are more visual:
Fork is to Grapefruit as Butterknife is to soup.
that sucked.
Today, I tried the smarter, more traditional route--the spoon method. A solution i thought would fare well for me, I see women on Lifetime eating their grapefruits with a spoon and it looks really tasty and clean--everything one could ever hope for in the grapefruit consumption experience. Not so.
I basically repeatedly stabbed the thing with my spoon, trying to scoop out whatever flesh so badly wanted to stay inside its skin. I ended up with a grapefruit bowl of mushy flesh floating in juice. It not only looked unedible, but again...it was a huge mess.
The frustrating thing about all this is that grapefruit isn't even that good! It's bitter and pungent, and the taste your left with lingers in the back of your tongue making everything else you taste afterward just as bitter. The reward of the grapefruit is very minimal compared to the work it takes to eat it.
I compare a grapefruit to a really ugly, unintelligent chick who's an absolute wench. Their physical suckage has no other redeeming qualities.
The last thing i'll say is that in juice form...i accept the grapefruit. Greyhounds are one of my favorite cocktails.
Similar Foods to Be Added to the BlackList:
- Crab
- Sunflower Seeds
- Coconut
- Oysters
- Tripe
